The Little Things Make the Difference

Posted by Hannah Hill in Singleness, Standards on 11 6th, 2009 | View Comments

Many singles feel stuck in a season of limbo, where nothing matters and serious life starts with marriage. This idea is a lie.

Not only is this season preparation for marriage, it’s also a test to see how well you will do when married.

courtship-little-thing

Faithful in the little things

The relationship habits you develop right now are habits you’ll carry into your future relationship. They won’t be erased and reformatted the night before the wedding.

Jesus said “He that is faithful in that which is least, is faithful also in much.” (Luke 16:10) This principle applies to relationships as well as finances, opportunities, etc. How you interact with the people in your life now is an accurate indicator of how you will act in the future.

How do you interact with your parents and siblings? If you can get along with your family, you can get along with anyone. However, God didn’t intend for families to simply cope with each other.

Quick Test

Are you:

seeking to serve?
practicing genuine love?
honoring authority?
being a “giver” rather than a “taker” in the relationship?

If we’re not practicing these things now, why do we think we can suddenly start doing it when we marry? If we have not been faithful with the lesser relationships we have, how can we ask God to entrust to us a marriage relationship? You attract the quality of person you are, so if you want to attract a high caliber soul-mate, you must yourself be a high caliber person.

From Shepherd to King

Consider the Biblical example of David. He was the youngest in his family and was assigned the job of watching the sheep. His older brothers had great opportunities following the banner of the King, and David had none. From a human perspective, he had no future. However, when God saw that he was ready, David was thrust suddenly onto the national stage, and an odyssey began for him that ended at the throne of Israel itself.

Many young people feel like David, and are tempted to waste the opportunities they have. Resist this temptation.

The reason some never leave the sheepfold is because they don’t learn the lessons of the sheepfold.

The greatest training ground for a successful marriage is the relationships you have right now. If I fail with those relationships, I have no business worrying about the fact that I may not know many potential mates or that I have no prospect of finding someone.

If David had not been faithful defending the sheep how could he have stood before Saul and said he could defeat Goliath? If you can’t keep your room clean how do expect to manage a household?

Faithfulness in the small, insignificant things brings rewards, greater opportunities, and the praise of the Master. “Well done, good and faithful servant; thou hast been faithful over a few things, I will make thee ruler over many things: enter thou into the joy of thy lord.” (Matt. 25:23)

What do you think?

How do you know when you are ready to get married?
Do you feel your current relationships are preparing you to get married?

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I realy like the Biblical example of David on relationship.
Car Shipping

in the bible we have so many examples of the little things in life. But faith the size of a mustard seed can move a mountains. The book of Samuel can tell you about it. God is good, God is great.
Elizabeth

So true about relationships, not only with family members but also with friends. We can spend less time with people who annoy us or make us feel uncomfortable. We can avoid certain conflicts or bad habits. But where are you going to run from your spouse? How long will you be able to ignore those little problem areas? I have been trying to work on my conflict-resolution skills, because I know that in marriage I will need to constantly put my husband first.
Brian

Travis, that's great. I think you're right on. Interesting passage for me is:

http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=1%2...

I'd be very interested to see you go over 1 Cor 7, Thomas.

> < > Brian
Tom

How do you know if you are ready to get married? If I waited until I was ready, I probably would have never gotten married. If we had waited until we were ready to have children we would not have had children. If I waited until I was ready to ____ I would have not ____. Are we really ready for anything? Once God says to do something, "just do it." Marriage is 2 questions: what does God say, and what does your girl friend say? Big decisions require big guidance, and marriage is a big decision. Is God leading me to marry this girl? When is His timing? God, please give me wisdom how to know how. And help me not to make a fool of myself or break this woman of God's heart.
Hannah Hill

Hey Tom, I understand your concern, and it is challenging to know sometimes how "ready" you have to be to be ready (for anything!). However, I do think we need to remember that this same thing could be said of the qualifications Scripture gives for elders and deacons.

How given to hospitality do you have to be to be "given to hospitality"? How well do you have to rule your house to "rule your house well"? How apt to teach to you have to be to be "apt to teach"? Does the fact that these questions exist and are real issues mean that we should just throw God's prescribed qualifications out the window?

Now certainly there is not a prescribed set of qualifications for folks who want to marry, as there is for elders and deacons. But, I do think that the same principle applies to both situations. Uncertainty about how to apply standards doesn't mean they should be discarded, simplified, or thrown out the window.
Travis Thomas

Great explanation right out of the Word, you are completely right. One statement my pastor tells single Christians is " don't spend all your time trying to find the right one, just be the right one and they will come in due time"

There is always a test of our faithfulness and a walking out of our stewardship before God. This is part of maturity, many Christians feel God will do everything for them. I just finished speaking of this in church, great lesson, gotta get back to my school work though. God Bless
Brianna Davis

This is very good point, and from a purely practical perspective, it is right on. however, as a Christian, we must remind ourselves of what our purpose is on earth. The goal of our lives is not to get married, at least it shouldn't be. The ultimate goal of our life should be to strive to be more like Christ and to fall more and more in love with him.
We as singles fall into this trap time and time again, (you would think I have learned the lesson the first dozen times) We think that our problems will be solved when we get married, settle down and start a family. Thats not true. As a single person, you have so much time to your leisure, time that as a married person you would use to focus on your family. Instead of using this time pining for your fantasy world of marrital bliss, use this time to glorify God, strengthening your relationship with him. The most important thing you can do practically to prepare for marriage is to become so in love for God that nothing can come in between you and him. Ultimately, he is the only love you need!

1 Corinthians 7:32-34 ~ An unmarried man can spend his time doing the Lord's work and thinking how to please him. But a married man can't do that so well. he has to think about his earthly responsibilites and how to please his wife. A woman who is no longer married or has never been married can be more devoted to the Lord in body and in spirit, while the married woman must be concerned about her earthly responsibilities and how to please her husband.
chasemarberry

This is right on. Very timely for me. Great points. I have become more satisfied and content with my current place in life as a single person because I see the potential I have to prepare and become the best person BEFORE I even start looking for a wife. And I am having a lot of fun in the process.

The Little Things Make the Difference

Faithful in the little things

Quick Test

From Shepherd to King

What do you think?

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